“It’s like a circus going on inside my head,” he replied.
I tried to understand.
He was “Labeled” ADHD — many students are.
His enormous physical form always dominated the classroom.
No one in the school was ever afraid of him.
He was and is the salt of the earth.
The concept of true understanding and assistance is
not an easy burden to unfold. It is an uphill climb
with no rolling back. It is a voluminous task of
empathy and perseverance.
Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is one of the most common mental disorders affecting children. Symptoms of ADHD include inattention (not being able to keep focus), hyperactivity (excess movement that is not fitting to the setting), and impulsivity (hasty acts that occur at the moment without thought).
Labels dominate our culture. They exist in every form, everywhere you look. They are on our children, co-workers, elderly, clothing, food, consumer goods, furniture- even on my pillow.
As a society, we try to define items so we can both benefit and understand their purpose.
We do that with our children as well.
Mental acuity, perception, ability, and standards of “norm” influence our daily interactions with all those we see. We judge (quietly) even if we never admit to it. We form silent opinions even of the Target cashier when checking out retail items. Let’s be real.
Although we may come to admit life is full of diversity and judgment, my point is that it does not have to be tainted with fear and avoidance.
Labels exist to assist, for convenience, to categorize, and to provide a format for a bit of understanding.
I tend to live and work outside of that box.
Look deeper. Are we all here to be changed to fit into another’s perspective?
Or can we just help each other move forward to the best of their ability?
Don’t we try to do that with our relationships? Children?
Medications are surely a necessity for many in all cultures. Self- understanding is also a necessity. It is a concept extremely difficult to reach. It cannot be taught, but it can be realized.
“It’s like a circus going on inside my head,” he replied.
This young man helped me to understand a bit of life in that single, spoken moment. He was 17 years of age — a senior in high school at the time- Honors English. As he grew- he began to understand himself and his needs. Instead of running in the halls of a high school, he began to run on the track. He ran to and from school- it was about 15 miles a day. He gained a gym membership by volunteering to advertise for them on a town website.
He came to understand both his strengths and his abilities. With much guidance, he embraced those aspects of himself. He embraced himself without prescription medication or self-medicating with weed or alcohol.
He now is in his twenties and manages three gyms in Connecticut. He is married, has a young son, is happy, and thriving.
He is the salt of the earth. Why? Because by being grounded he taught me to do so. It allowed me to see the world through his eyes to reach other students.
Thousands of children are classified in our culture and married to tons of difficult-to-read medical, social, and learning documents that they are unaware exist. The kids are pushed forward by adults with little or no understanding of their learning styles or strengths.
Sure some parents share basic information, but many do not. Often by the time a classified student arrives in their freshman year in high school, many feel defeated and less than. They have been in smaller classes, encumbered by “specials” and see the difference in treatment between them and their peers of age.
What is my point? We all need to be aware of our strengths and work with them for the betterment of ourselves. Age-appropriate education and true empathic communication aid in our future evolution to adulthood.
We all have strengths and weaknesses.
We all need grounding from time to time.
Labels may have some value but are not the key to success.